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I’m completely indifferent to marmite, or vegemite, although I quite like twiglets (which are nought but stale marmitey wotsits). I don’t love it or hate it.

I do hate people who say “I’m like marmite me, you either love me or you hate me”, mainly because the sort of people who say it are failed reality show auditionees. It’s a fair indication that the person hasn’t had an original thought for years, and that some people do hate them.

I now hate Jack Straw, and John Humphrys’ (why no ‘e’?) publishers who thought that this was a great and witty pull out quote for the front of this book.

Oh and I hate marmite’s advertising agency for sullying the wonder that is Paddington Bear.

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